Mislukkings en Suksesse. Om die beste van jou mislukkings en suksesse te maak, moet jy dit vinnig kan vergeet. Moenie dit te veel kop toe vat nie. Lewe elke dag voluit sonder bagasie of die glorie van die verlede.
Die effek van sukses of mislukking kan ʼn dramatiese gevolg in mense se lewe, veral in ons kinders se lewe, hê. Ons almal onthou tog nog daai vrees … Jy is in die laerskool en so bang om te misluk. Maar hoekom? Waarom is kinders so bang om te misluk?
Grootpraat plaas onnodige druk op kinders
Kinders is bang hulle stel hulle ouers teleur. “My kind is hierdie hero … my kind is amazing … my kind gaan goed doen.” En só boost jy amper jou kind bokant sy vermoë.
Ouers moet altyd ʼn fyn balans handhaaf tussen te veel en te min. Dit is die spel van die lewe – die balans-ding. Jy kan ook nie vir elke kind dieselfde ding sê nie, want elke kind is anders. Sommige kinders interpreteer ʼn ding anders.
Die kuns van ouerskap is om te weet wie jou kind is, en hoe hy of sy dinge hanteer. Ons gáán somtyds foute maak. Maar dan vrae jy: Vergewe my. Want ons is nie altyd perfek nie.
As jou kind op laerskool presteer, gaan op jou knieë en bid vir baie, baie krag. Kinders wat op laerskool presteer, presteer oor twee redes: hoe vroeg of laat hy in die jaar gebore is, en ʼn bietjie meer talent.
Talente is nie die verskilmaker nie, karakter is
Kinders wat in Januarie, Februarie of Maart gebore is, is amper ʼn jaar ouer, ʼn jaar groter as dié outjie wat einde November gebore is. Op laerskool het dit ʼn groot effek op iemand se lewe.
So, wie wen op laerskool? Die ouens wat vroeg in die jaar gebore is. Maar hulle besef dit nie. Hulle sê die ander ou is swakker, ek is beter … Die ander rede waarom kinders op laerskool wen, is omdat hulle ʼn klein bietjie meer talent het. Onthou, talent is ʼn gelykmaker.
Wanneer jy op hoërskool in graad agt of graad nege kom, is talent nie meer die verskilmaker nie. Dan word karakter die verskilmaker. Karakter beteken wie jy is, nie watter talent jy het nie. Almal het talent. Almal kan ʼn bietjie hardloop, ʼn bal gooi, ʼn bietjie wat ook al.
Die vraag is: Wat is die effek van sukses of mislukking op ʼn mens se brein?
Leer om van jou mislukkings én suksesse te vergeet
ʼn Goeie reël om toe te pas, is om te vergeet. Hoe vinniger jy kan leer om te vergeet, hoe beter is dit vir jou toekoms. Vergeet van jou sukses en vergeet van jou mislukking. Jou sukses moet jou nie opblaas nie. Maar net so moet jou mislukkings jou ook nie meer pla nie. Jy moet die vermoë hê om van alles te kan vergeet.
Die lewe is ʼn proses. Maar wat jy op hierdie oomblik doen, is al wat tel. Jy kan nie die verlede saamsleep nie. Somtyds is selfs sukses ʼn geweldige swaar ding om saam te sleep, want dit gee jou ʼn valse illusie van jou toekoms.
Vir sukses én mislukking moet jy dus ʼn kort geheue ontwikkel. Besef dat elke dag ʼn avontuur word wanneer jy nie meer gister saam met jou in die toekoms indra nie. Eers dan kan jy elke dag voluit leef!
- Deur: Jannie Putter, Leierskap- en persoonlike ontwikkeling. https://www.jannieputter.co.za
Do not drag your success and failures with you
To make the most of your failures and successes, you need to be able to quickly forget about them. Don’t take it too much head on. Live every day to the fullest without baggage or the glory of the past.
The effect of success or failure can have a dramatic effect in people’s lives, especially in our children’s lives. We all still remember that fear after all… You’re in elementary school and so afraid of failing. But why? Why are children so afraid of failing?
Big talk puts undue pressure on children
Children are afraid they disappoint their parents. “My child is this hero… my child is amazing… my child is going to do well.” And that’s how you almost boost your child beyond his means.
Parents should always maintain a fine balance between too much and too little. It’s the game of life – the balance thing. You also can’t say the same thing to every child because every child is different. Some kids interpret a thing differently.
The art of parenting is knowing who your child is, and how he or she handles things. We can sometimes make mistakes. But then you question: Forgive me. Because we’re not always perfect.
If your child excels in elementary school, get on your knees and pray for lots, lots of strength. Children who excel in elementary school excel for two reasons: how early or late he was born in the year, and a little more talent.
Talents are not the difference maker, character is
Children born in January, February or March are almost a year older, a year larger than the little guy born in late November. In elementary school, it has a huge effect on someone’s life.
So who wins in elementary school? The guys who were born early in the year. But they don’t realize it. They say the other guy is weaker, I’m better… The other reason kids win in elementary school is because they have a tiny bit more talent. Remember, talent is an equalizer.
When you get into high school in grade eight or grade nine, talent is no longer the difference maker. Then character becomes the difference maker. Character means who you are, not what talent you have. Everyone has talent. Everyone can run a little bit, throw a ball, a little whatever.
The question is: What is the effect of success or failure on one’s brain?
Learn to forget about your failures and successes
A good rule of thumb to apply is to forget. The faster you can learn to forget, the better it is for your future. Forget about your success and forget about your failure.
Your success should not blow you up. But just like that, your failures shouldn’t bother you anymore either. You must have the ability to forget about everything.
Life is a process. But what you’re serving right now is all that counts. You can’t drag the past with you. Sometimes even success is a tremendously heavy thing to drag along, because it gives you a false illusion of your future.
- Jannie Putter, Leadership and Personal Development. https://www.jannieputter.co.za
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